Amalgamblog

For our very first Top Ten Tuesday, we took a look at “The Most Awesomely Random College Football Mascots”. It is actually our most read Amalgamblog entry ever; several thousand crashed the site in a few days thanks to a fluke link on Sports Illustrated’s website. Now with the dawn of the new baseball season and as we celebrate our 30th Top Ten Tuesday, we look to a sport that makes those random college football mascots look downright ordinary: Minor League Baseball. And the list could go much further than these ten. First a quick Major League related sidenote: The Atlanta Braves have always been the Official Team of Top Ten Tuesday, but if the San Diego Padres bring back their old swinging friar logo (seen to the left) they will easily be in our two slot. We’ll even call you the Official B-Team of Top Ten Tuesday. Anyway, without further ado here’s your Top Ten.

10. Brooklyn Cyclones

At first glance you might think, “Cyclones, big deal.” However this single A affiliate of the New York Mets is not named after the natural phenomenon, but after a famous Coney Island roller coaster. This makes Brooklyn the only sports team, to my knowledge, named after an amusement park ride. Though I’m hoping the Angels will soon change their name to the Los Angeles Big Thunder Mountains of Anaheim.

9. Erie SeaWolves

You can name your team the Pirates. Or your can go with SeaWolves, name your anthropomorphic canine pirate mascot C. Wolf, and introduce said mascot with Duran Duran’s 80s-tastic “Hungry Like the Wolf”. You picked the second one didn’t you?

8. Lansing Lugnuts

Perfect nickname for a Michigan-based team. It has to be car-related, but not too obvious a la basketball’s Detroit Pistons. What you get is an anthropomorphic lugnut. Though I have to point out, and I know that the economy is a bit rough in the Great Lake State right now, that it looks like the lugnut is frowning. I want a happy lugnut or a fierce lugnut; not a sad lugnut. Though perhaps he’s sad because the players of this Blue Jays affiliated team will realize their great American dream by playing in the majors…in Canada.

7. Las Vegas 51s

Perhaps this is the influence of this summer’s upcoming “Invasion” theme, but I still think this AAA Blue Jays farm club has a nice creative streak. First, they took the 51s route (after the infamous Area 51), instead of naming the team the Aliens, Martians, or ETs. Secondly, I dig the subtle baseball seaming on the alien head in their logo.

 

6. Savannah Sand Gnats

At first I wondered why you would want to name your team after a little pest that you can easily swat away. Then I discovered that these insects are little biting bloodsuckers that leave red, itchy bumps and it made sense. It says the team is scrappy, that they’ll swarm you. Though if you are going to name your team after bloodsucking insect, why not get creative and go with VampireBugs?

 

5. Toledo Mud Hens

These days when teams want to come up with a nickname, they have contests or hire focus groups to formulate the name that will be best for marketing. How did Corporal Klinger’s favorite team come up with Mud Hens in the late 19th Century? The stadium was close to marshlands and waterfowl. And personally I think we’re all winners when we get baseball-playing poultry.

4. Auburn Doubledays

Here’s to remembering your roots. This single-A Blue Jays farm club is named after Abner Doubleday, the man that is credited with inventing baseball and also a native of Auburn, NY. A great tribute to the founder of the game, plus a awesome logo with a old school baseball player sporting a handlebar mustache.

3. Lehigh Valley IronPigs

Let’s start out with the fact that “IronPigs” sounds like it would have been a great 1990s Saturday morning cartoon (back when everyone was trying to rip off the success of the Ninja Turtles). I can see the tagline now: “The IronPigs: Here to Save Your Bacon!” But this Triple-A Phillies affiliate is named after a regional aspect as well. Pig iron is used to manufacture steel, for which Lehigh Valley is famous.

2. Brevard County Manatees

I can’t believe that someone would name a sports team after perhaps, as my brother put it, the most unathletic animal ever. Now it does make good sense to give the endangered manatee a baseball bat to protect themselves. It’s all pretty nonsensical; all of which makes this Brewers farm club (maybe that explains things) one of the most awesomely random teams.

1. Montgomery Biscuits

But nothing, absolutely nothing, can top naming your team after a breakfast item. The Double-A team selected the Biscuits after a name the team contest. Apparently, the owners like it for its pun-worthy potential (for example: “Hey Butter, Butter, Butter”). Their mascot Monty even starred in his own documentary. The icing on the cake (or butter on the biscuit, if you will): they fire biscuits out of air cannons into the stands during games. And that’s why they are our number 1.

Tags: minor league baseball

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